How does Santa eat every cookie?












22














Cookies are left for Santa Claus every Christmas in nearly every home. How can he possibly eat all of them every year without getting type 2 diabetes? And if he likes them so much (for we know that he does), he would be eating even more at the North Pole! It would be a dangerous and life-threatening job for him...










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  • 5




    Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
    – Mike Scott
    Dec 27 '18 at 7:37






  • 5




    Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
    – user6760
    Dec 27 '18 at 12:00






  • 10




    Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
    – val
    Dec 27 '18 at 14:08






  • 4




    Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
    – BruceWayne
    Dec 27 '18 at 15:10








  • 1




    Guess what the sleigh runs on...
    – Harper
    2 days ago
















22














Cookies are left for Santa Claus every Christmas in nearly every home. How can he possibly eat all of them every year without getting type 2 diabetes? And if he likes them so much (for we know that he does), he would be eating even more at the North Pole! It would be a dangerous and life-threatening job for him...










share|improve this question









New contributor




Silver is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
















  • 5




    Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
    – Mike Scott
    Dec 27 '18 at 7:37






  • 5




    Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
    – user6760
    Dec 27 '18 at 12:00






  • 10




    Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
    – val
    Dec 27 '18 at 14:08






  • 4




    Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
    – BruceWayne
    Dec 27 '18 at 15:10








  • 1




    Guess what the sleigh runs on...
    – Harper
    2 days ago














22












22








22


2





Cookies are left for Santa Claus every Christmas in nearly every home. How can he possibly eat all of them every year without getting type 2 diabetes? And if he likes them so much (for we know that he does), he would be eating even more at the North Pole! It would be a dangerous and life-threatening job for him...










share|improve this question









New contributor




Silver is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.











Cookies are left for Santa Claus every Christmas in nearly every home. How can he possibly eat all of them every year without getting type 2 diabetes? And if he likes them so much (for we know that he does), he would be eating even more at the North Pole! It would be a dangerous and life-threatening job for him...







santa-claus






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share|improve this question









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edited Dec 27 '18 at 6:27





















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asked Dec 27 '18 at 6:20









Silver

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11916




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Silver is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.






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Check out our Code of Conduct.








  • 5




    Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
    – Mike Scott
    Dec 27 '18 at 7:37






  • 5




    Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
    – user6760
    Dec 27 '18 at 12:00






  • 10




    Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
    – val
    Dec 27 '18 at 14:08






  • 4




    Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
    – BruceWayne
    Dec 27 '18 at 15:10








  • 1




    Guess what the sleigh runs on...
    – Harper
    2 days ago














  • 5




    Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
    – Mike Scott
    Dec 27 '18 at 7:37






  • 5




    Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
    – user6760
    Dec 27 '18 at 12:00






  • 10




    Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
    – val
    Dec 27 '18 at 14:08






  • 4




    Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
    – BruceWayne
    Dec 27 '18 at 15:10








  • 1




    Guess what the sleigh runs on...
    – Harper
    2 days ago








5




5




Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
– Mike Scott
Dec 27 '18 at 7:37




Santa is eating tens of thousands of tons of cookies in one night. He’s not going to live long enough to worry about diabetes — he won’t even get through New Zealand before dying of over-eating.
– Mike Scott
Dec 27 '18 at 7:37




5




5




Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
– user6760
Dec 27 '18 at 12:00




Xmas is about sharing so I can imagine Santa distributes these sugar free low cholesterol transfat free cookies to the elves and polar bears
– user6760
Dec 27 '18 at 12:00




10




10




Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
– val
Dec 27 '18 at 14:08




Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/1464
– val
Dec 27 '18 at 14:08




4




4




Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
– BruceWayne
Dec 27 '18 at 15:10






Who's to say Santa doesn't have diabetes?
– BruceWayne
Dec 27 '18 at 15:10






1




1




Guess what the sleigh runs on...
– Harper
2 days ago




Guess what the sleigh runs on...
– Harper
2 days ago










11 Answers
11






active

oldest

votes


















14














I'll focus on one aspect of the question.




without getting type 2 diabetes?




Type 2 diabetes is a disease. It is caused by a lack of enough insulin to push the excess sugar into the body cells (especially the fat cells).



The answer with the least assumptions is that santa's pancreas is very good and healthy. It can produce tons of insulin without getting damaged or fatigued. There are people like that in the real world.



What does he do with all those calories? Climbing up and down all those chimneys. He might share the cookies, but that is speculation. The guy is fat and magical anyway.






share|improve this answer





















  • Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
    – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
    Dec 28 '18 at 10:49










  • Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
    – Mindwin
    Dec 28 '18 at 15:52





















47














Santa and his reindeer have to move at fantastic speed to fulfill their yearly duty, this has been solidly established.



Moving at that fantastic speed requires a lot of energy, and all the cookies Santa (and the reindeer) eat at each stop are barely enough to cope with the energy demand.



Long story short: you can't develop diabetes if you have no excess sugar in your blood.






share|improve this answer

















  • 2




    You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
    – Joe Bloggs
    Dec 27 '18 at 10:39






  • 5




    @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
    – L.Dutch
    Dec 27 '18 at 10:45






  • 3




    e=mc2 ... There you go
    – NofP
    Dec 27 '18 at 18:18






  • 15




    Energie = Milk * Cookies²
    – Martijn
    Dec 28 '18 at 9:16










  • I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
    – Chan-Ho Suh
    Dec 29 '18 at 1:49





















31














It's very simple. He puts them in his sack. Whenever he leaves a present under the tree, a space is left in his sack. There is plenty of room for cookies. When he gets back to the North Pole he distributes them among the elves as a reward for all their hard work.






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  • 2




    :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
    – Amadeus
    Dec 27 '18 at 12:51






  • 1




    Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
    – Tyler S. Loeper
    Dec 27 '18 at 14:49






  • 2




    @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
    – T.J.L.
    Dec 27 '18 at 16:54












  • Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
    – Chan-Ho Suh
    Dec 29 '18 at 1:47



















13














As you may have read, Santa is an elf, as mentioned in this popular Christmas poem:




He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself




Elves have been known to eat cookies twice their size and gain no weight.



enter image description here






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    10














    Santa is Quantum



    He is able to do this because Santa's magic is based on quantum mechanics.



    He visits everyone's house and nobodies house, all at the same time. Additionally, he eats all of the cookies and none of the cookies all at the same time.



    That's why it's so important that all the kids are in bed, or he can't visit them. If someone were to observe him or observe his absence, it would collapse the quantum state and he would either have only visited that one house or visited every other house but that one.






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    • Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
      – cpcodes
      Dec 28 '18 at 0:31










    • @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
      – Alexander O'Mara
      Dec 28 '18 at 0:41





















    5














    Technically Santa does not actually eat the cookies, although he does feed them to his Alchemist Delight 3000 Matter Warping 3D printer (AD3k). The cookies are raw material for the printer which is used to print all the toys Santa delivers. Because the Printer can transform the raw material into whatever molecular structure is required at the Point of Printing (POP) using Just-In-Time Quantum Transmutation (JITQT), most anything would do for raw material. The cookie and milk thing was just a convenient way to make sure something relatively consistent was on hand for processing. Santa used to use coal but it was pretty messy and heavy to haul around. This was also the reason bad children used to get coal in their stockings. It was really the same present they would have gotten had they been good, but Santa used it as a metaphor for the fact that the child had not put the effort into being a better person and so Santa had not put the effort into transforming the coal to a better present.
    Interestingly, the processing of the raw materials into presents uses energy created by a room temperature fusion pre-processor on the AD3k and, since the pre-processing generates far more energy than is required by the JITQT, the additional energy is piped back to power the sleigh. This used to generate a great deal of heat and so Santa had to run the feed line down the chimney for insulation against any heat damage. In recent years though, Santa's R&D team came up with a special super cooled cable made of Nb-Ti fibers in an aluminium and copper matrix that is flexible enough so it can be dropped through a window, door or ventilation duct.






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      4














      A fun fact about Santa is that he is like a bear, except he hibernates the rest of the year except winter. So he has to eat a whole lot of sugar, fruit, or anything that the good boys and girls live to him so he can stay the rest of the year cozy in his north pole house.






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        2














        Santa is at minimum a being with access to some technology that lets him, travel faster than the speed of light without destroying everything he interacts with, keep track of every living human simultaneously with enough detail to judge weather they've been good or bad, fit through any space he wants, carry a toy for every child on the planet in a sack - while going faster than light speed mind you -, and the means of producing a toy for every child on the planet based on how good they've been and what they've requested.



        Santa is very easily a being on par with or greater than Zeus, the Greek god of thunder. Santa can do whatever he wants. For all we know, Santa dilates time to fit his needs and has replacedadded several of his organs to synthesize all the nutrients he needs from milk and cookies. Santa could be taking several years from his side of things to deliver all of these toys. The milk and cookies could be the only food he has to survive. He could be eating a perfectly healthy diet, living at a perfectly healthy weight, for whatever species a Santa is.



        tl:dr; Santa might as well be Thanos or Darkseid. Santa could easily be stronger and more cunning than both too. Santa eats what Santa wants.






        share|improve this answer





























          1














          The cookies Santa eats don't go into his normal stomach, but into a matter converter that provides most of the energy to lift his sleigh full of toys and power the Tardis-like sack that pulls the right toy for the right child across the fourth dimension.



          The preference for chimneys as home entry paths was to disguise the plumes of steam and smoke early versions of the process produced.






          share|improve this answer





























            0














            As I've pointed out elsewhere, Santa is not sequential, he's (massively) parallel. So just as you need to connect every machine in your Beowulf cluster to a power source, every instance of Santa needs a certain number of cookies, and there are a sufficient number of instances to consume all the cookies without ill effects.



            *Note also that Santa is rather like a bear, in that those cookies he gets on Christmas Eve have to last him through the whole year.






            share|improve this answer





























              0














              Santa doesn't need to eat all the cookies. The non-believers just assume that the parents eat all the cookies while the children are in bed. Or the dog. And believers know it must be Santa and his reindeer.



              And who's to say they aren't both right? Santa is the master of stagemanship. He uses the fact that perception and reality often blur to make his mystique what it is today. Who knows how many of the cookies Santa eats. 50%? 10%? .00001%? How can you determine the amount if all the cookies are gone and no one can give you an un-biased answer?



              Santa knows how to make a name into a brand, and cookies are only the tip of the iceberg.






              share|improve this answer




















                protected by Community Dec 28 '18 at 11:47



                Thank you for your interest in this question.
                Because it has attracted low-quality or spam answers that had to be removed, posting an answer now requires 10 reputation on this site (the association bonus does not count).



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                11 Answers
                11






                active

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                11 Answers
                11






                active

                oldest

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                active

                oldest

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                active

                oldest

                votes









                14














                I'll focus on one aspect of the question.




                without getting type 2 diabetes?




                Type 2 diabetes is a disease. It is caused by a lack of enough insulin to push the excess sugar into the body cells (especially the fat cells).



                The answer with the least assumptions is that santa's pancreas is very good and healthy. It can produce tons of insulin without getting damaged or fatigued. There are people like that in the real world.



                What does he do with all those calories? Climbing up and down all those chimneys. He might share the cookies, but that is speculation. The guy is fat and magical anyway.






                share|improve this answer





















                • Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                  – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                  Dec 28 '18 at 10:49










                • Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                  – Mindwin
                  Dec 28 '18 at 15:52


















                14














                I'll focus on one aspect of the question.




                without getting type 2 diabetes?




                Type 2 diabetes is a disease. It is caused by a lack of enough insulin to push the excess sugar into the body cells (especially the fat cells).



                The answer with the least assumptions is that santa's pancreas is very good and healthy. It can produce tons of insulin without getting damaged or fatigued. There are people like that in the real world.



                What does he do with all those calories? Climbing up and down all those chimneys. He might share the cookies, but that is speculation. The guy is fat and magical anyway.






                share|improve this answer





















                • Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                  – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                  Dec 28 '18 at 10:49










                • Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                  – Mindwin
                  Dec 28 '18 at 15:52
















                14












                14








                14






                I'll focus on one aspect of the question.




                without getting type 2 diabetes?




                Type 2 diabetes is a disease. It is caused by a lack of enough insulin to push the excess sugar into the body cells (especially the fat cells).



                The answer with the least assumptions is that santa's pancreas is very good and healthy. It can produce tons of insulin without getting damaged or fatigued. There are people like that in the real world.



                What does he do with all those calories? Climbing up and down all those chimneys. He might share the cookies, but that is speculation. The guy is fat and magical anyway.






                share|improve this answer












                I'll focus on one aspect of the question.




                without getting type 2 diabetes?




                Type 2 diabetes is a disease. It is caused by a lack of enough insulin to push the excess sugar into the body cells (especially the fat cells).



                The answer with the least assumptions is that santa's pancreas is very good and healthy. It can produce tons of insulin without getting damaged or fatigued. There are people like that in the real world.



                What does he do with all those calories? Climbing up and down all those chimneys. He might share the cookies, but that is speculation. The guy is fat and magical anyway.







                share|improve this answer












                share|improve this answer



                share|improve this answer










                answered Dec 27 '18 at 11:30









                Mindwin

                6,15642662




                6,15642662












                • Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                  – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                  Dec 28 '18 at 10:49










                • Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                  – Mindwin
                  Dec 28 '18 at 15:52




















                • Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                  – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                  Dec 28 '18 at 10:49










                • Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                  – Mindwin
                  Dec 28 '18 at 15:52


















                Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                Dec 28 '18 at 10:49




                Not quite. You can have a lot of insulin with diabetes 2. It just doesn't work well enough.
                – Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen
                Dec 28 '18 at 10:49












                Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                – Mindwin
                Dec 28 '18 at 15:52






                Yeah for some people it is true, but the point is: Santa is not sick. And even with insulin resistance (that every fat person has) the answer states that he makes enough insulin. Not a lot. Enough.
                – Mindwin
                Dec 28 '18 at 15:52













                47














                Santa and his reindeer have to move at fantastic speed to fulfill their yearly duty, this has been solidly established.



                Moving at that fantastic speed requires a lot of energy, and all the cookies Santa (and the reindeer) eat at each stop are barely enough to cope with the energy demand.



                Long story short: you can't develop diabetes if you have no excess sugar in your blood.






                share|improve this answer

















                • 2




                  You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                  – Joe Bloggs
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:39






                • 5




                  @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                  – L.Dutch
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:45






                • 3




                  e=mc2 ... There you go
                  – NofP
                  Dec 27 '18 at 18:18






                • 15




                  Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                  – Martijn
                  Dec 28 '18 at 9:16










                • I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:49


















                47














                Santa and his reindeer have to move at fantastic speed to fulfill their yearly duty, this has been solidly established.



                Moving at that fantastic speed requires a lot of energy, and all the cookies Santa (and the reindeer) eat at each stop are barely enough to cope with the energy demand.



                Long story short: you can't develop diabetes if you have no excess sugar in your blood.






                share|improve this answer

















                • 2




                  You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                  – Joe Bloggs
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:39






                • 5




                  @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                  – L.Dutch
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:45






                • 3




                  e=mc2 ... There you go
                  – NofP
                  Dec 27 '18 at 18:18






                • 15




                  Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                  – Martijn
                  Dec 28 '18 at 9:16










                • I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:49
















                47












                47








                47






                Santa and his reindeer have to move at fantastic speed to fulfill their yearly duty, this has been solidly established.



                Moving at that fantastic speed requires a lot of energy, and all the cookies Santa (and the reindeer) eat at each stop are barely enough to cope with the energy demand.



                Long story short: you can't develop diabetes if you have no excess sugar in your blood.






                share|improve this answer












                Santa and his reindeer have to move at fantastic speed to fulfill their yearly duty, this has been solidly established.



                Moving at that fantastic speed requires a lot of energy, and all the cookies Santa (and the reindeer) eat at each stop are barely enough to cope with the energy demand.



                Long story short: you can't develop diabetes if you have no excess sugar in your blood.







                share|improve this answer












                share|improve this answer



                share|improve this answer










                answered Dec 27 '18 at 6:30









                L.Dutch

                76.7k25183374




                76.7k25183374








                • 2




                  You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                  – Joe Bloggs
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:39






                • 5




                  @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                  – L.Dutch
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:45






                • 3




                  e=mc2 ... There you go
                  – NofP
                  Dec 27 '18 at 18:18






                • 15




                  Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                  – Martijn
                  Dec 28 '18 at 9:16










                • I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:49
















                • 2




                  You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                  – Joe Bloggs
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:39






                • 5




                  @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                  – L.Dutch
                  Dec 27 '18 at 10:45






                • 3




                  e=mc2 ... There you go
                  – NofP
                  Dec 27 '18 at 18:18






                • 15




                  Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                  – Martijn
                  Dec 28 '18 at 9:16










                • I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:49










                2




                2




                You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                – Joe Bloggs
                Dec 27 '18 at 10:39




                You need a whole lotta cookies to accelerate like Santa does!
                – Joe Bloggs
                Dec 27 '18 at 10:39




                5




                5




                @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                – L.Dutch
                Dec 27 '18 at 10:45




                @JoeBloggs, not if you use, ahem ahem, milk plus to make the cookie dough...
                – L.Dutch
                Dec 27 '18 at 10:45




                3




                3




                e=mc2 ... There you go
                – NofP
                Dec 27 '18 at 18:18




                e=mc2 ... There you go
                – NofP
                Dec 27 '18 at 18:18




                15




                15




                Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                – Martijn
                Dec 28 '18 at 9:16




                Energie = Milk * Cookies²
                – Martijn
                Dec 28 '18 at 9:16












                I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                – Chan-Ho Suh
                Dec 29 '18 at 1:49






                I think this is a better answer than the accepted, as it resolves different questions about Santa cohesively, rather than just as a one-off, e.g. "he has a magical pancreas".
                – Chan-Ho Suh
                Dec 29 '18 at 1:49













                31














                It's very simple. He puts them in his sack. Whenever he leaves a present under the tree, a space is left in his sack. There is plenty of room for cookies. When he gets back to the North Pole he distributes them among the elves as a reward for all their hard work.






                share|improve this answer

















                • 2




                  :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                  – Amadeus
                  Dec 27 '18 at 12:51






                • 1




                  Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                  – Tyler S. Loeper
                  Dec 27 '18 at 14:49






                • 2




                  @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                  – T.J.L.
                  Dec 27 '18 at 16:54












                • Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:47
















                31














                It's very simple. He puts them in his sack. Whenever he leaves a present under the tree, a space is left in his sack. There is plenty of room for cookies. When he gets back to the North Pole he distributes them among the elves as a reward for all their hard work.






                share|improve this answer

















                • 2




                  :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                  – Amadeus
                  Dec 27 '18 at 12:51






                • 1




                  Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                  – Tyler S. Loeper
                  Dec 27 '18 at 14:49






                • 2




                  @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                  – T.J.L.
                  Dec 27 '18 at 16:54












                • Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:47














                31












                31








                31






                It's very simple. He puts them in his sack. Whenever he leaves a present under the tree, a space is left in his sack. There is plenty of room for cookies. When he gets back to the North Pole he distributes them among the elves as a reward for all their hard work.






                share|improve this answer












                It's very simple. He puts them in his sack. Whenever he leaves a present under the tree, a space is left in his sack. There is plenty of room for cookies. When he gets back to the North Pole he distributes them among the elves as a reward for all their hard work.







                share|improve this answer












                share|improve this answer



                share|improve this answer










                answered Dec 27 '18 at 11:02









                chasly from UK

                12.7k356113




                12.7k356113








                • 2




                  :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                  – Amadeus
                  Dec 27 '18 at 12:51






                • 1




                  Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                  – Tyler S. Loeper
                  Dec 27 '18 at 14:49






                • 2




                  @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                  – T.J.L.
                  Dec 27 '18 at 16:54












                • Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:47














                • 2




                  :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                  – Amadeus
                  Dec 27 '18 at 12:51






                • 1




                  Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                  – Tyler S. Loeper
                  Dec 27 '18 at 14:49






                • 2




                  @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                  – T.J.L.
                  Dec 27 '18 at 16:54












                • Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                  – Chan-Ho Suh
                  Dec 29 '18 at 1:47








                2




                2




                :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                – Amadeus
                Dec 27 '18 at 12:51




                :-) I would also point out that the sack (and/or sleigh) must be something of a Tardis, much bigger on the inside, with an anti-gravity mechanism; in order to hold presents for the billion or so people that celebrate Christmas and transport them all in something as small as a compact car. It may have space for an infinite number of cookies. And milk!
                – Amadeus
                Dec 27 '18 at 12:51




                1




                1




                Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                – Tyler S. Loeper
                Dec 27 '18 at 14:49




                Exactly what I was going to point out. Who is to say he actually eats the cookies.
                – Tyler S. Loeper
                Dec 27 '18 at 14:49




                2




                2




                @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                – T.J.L.
                Dec 27 '18 at 16:54






                @Amadeus Your count of a billion or so people is based on the potentially erroneous assumption that he actually visits every appropriately inclined household. The existence of a naughty list and a nice list does not automatically mean that the union of those two lists is identical to the set of all possible people. (In other words, most people may actually be on neither list, and Santa only visits the exceptional people that make his two lists.)
                – T.J.L.
                Dec 27 '18 at 16:54














                Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                – Chan-Ho Suh
                Dec 29 '18 at 1:47




                Nice answer, but part of the worldbuilding here is that Santa eats the cookies. That's the premise of the question.
                – Chan-Ho Suh
                Dec 29 '18 at 1:47











                13














                As you may have read, Santa is an elf, as mentioned in this popular Christmas poem:




                He had a broad face and a little round belly,
                That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
                He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
                And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself




                Elves have been known to eat cookies twice their size and gain no weight.



                enter image description here






                share|improve this answer


























                  13














                  As you may have read, Santa is an elf, as mentioned in this popular Christmas poem:




                  He had a broad face and a little round belly,
                  That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
                  He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
                  And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself




                  Elves have been known to eat cookies twice their size and gain no weight.



                  enter image description here






                  share|improve this answer
























                    13












                    13








                    13






                    As you may have read, Santa is an elf, as mentioned in this popular Christmas poem:




                    He had a broad face and a little round belly,
                    That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
                    He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
                    And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself




                    Elves have been known to eat cookies twice their size and gain no weight.



                    enter image description here






                    share|improve this answer












                    As you may have read, Santa is an elf, as mentioned in this popular Christmas poem:




                    He had a broad face and a little round belly,
                    That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
                    He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
                    And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself




                    Elves have been known to eat cookies twice their size and gain no weight.



                    enter image description here







                    share|improve this answer












                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer










                    answered Dec 27 '18 at 10:57









                    John Wu

                    418210




                    418210























                        10














                        Santa is Quantum



                        He is able to do this because Santa's magic is based on quantum mechanics.



                        He visits everyone's house and nobodies house, all at the same time. Additionally, he eats all of the cookies and none of the cookies all at the same time.



                        That's why it's so important that all the kids are in bed, or he can't visit them. If someone were to observe him or observe his absence, it would collapse the quantum state and he would either have only visited that one house or visited every other house but that one.






                        share|improve this answer










                        New contributor




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                        Check out our Code of Conduct.


















                        • Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                          – cpcodes
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:31










                        • @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                          – Alexander O'Mara
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:41


















                        10














                        Santa is Quantum



                        He is able to do this because Santa's magic is based on quantum mechanics.



                        He visits everyone's house and nobodies house, all at the same time. Additionally, he eats all of the cookies and none of the cookies all at the same time.



                        That's why it's so important that all the kids are in bed, or he can't visit them. If someone were to observe him or observe his absence, it would collapse the quantum state and he would either have only visited that one house or visited every other house but that one.






                        share|improve this answer










                        New contributor




                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.


















                        • Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                          – cpcodes
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:31










                        • @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                          – Alexander O'Mara
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:41
















                        10












                        10








                        10






                        Santa is Quantum



                        He is able to do this because Santa's magic is based on quantum mechanics.



                        He visits everyone's house and nobodies house, all at the same time. Additionally, he eats all of the cookies and none of the cookies all at the same time.



                        That's why it's so important that all the kids are in bed, or he can't visit them. If someone were to observe him or observe his absence, it would collapse the quantum state and he would either have only visited that one house or visited every other house but that one.






                        share|improve this answer










                        New contributor




                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.









                        Santa is Quantum



                        He is able to do this because Santa's magic is based on quantum mechanics.



                        He visits everyone's house and nobodies house, all at the same time. Additionally, he eats all of the cookies and none of the cookies all at the same time.



                        That's why it's so important that all the kids are in bed, or he can't visit them. If someone were to observe him or observe his absence, it would collapse the quantum state and he would either have only visited that one house or visited every other house but that one.







                        share|improve this answer










                        New contributor




                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.









                        share|improve this answer



                        share|improve this answer








                        edited Dec 28 '18 at 0:40





















                        New contributor




                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                        answered Dec 27 '18 at 19:36









                        Alexander O'Mara

                        20116




                        20116




                        New contributor




                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.





                        New contributor





                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.






                        Alexander O'Mara is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                        Check out our Code of Conduct.












                        • Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                          – cpcodes
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:31










                        • @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                          – Alexander O'Mara
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:41




















                        • Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                          – cpcodes
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:31










                        • @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                          – Alexander O'Mara
                          Dec 28 '18 at 0:41


















                        Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                        – cpcodes
                        Dec 28 '18 at 0:31




                        Actually, the state could be collapsed locally so that he does not visit THAT house where his absence was observed, but still have visited all of the other houses. Hence why it is important to be in bed when he visits, or he won't visit at all. This assumes that he has some control over collapsing wave functions, removing some of the randomness from QM - hence magic (or sufficiently advanced technology).
                        – cpcodes
                        Dec 28 '18 at 0:31












                        @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                        – Alexander O'Mara
                        Dec 28 '18 at 0:41






                        @cpcodes Good point. Quantum mechanics + pseudo-science narative is confusing.
                        – Alexander O'Mara
                        Dec 28 '18 at 0:41













                        5














                        Technically Santa does not actually eat the cookies, although he does feed them to his Alchemist Delight 3000 Matter Warping 3D printer (AD3k). The cookies are raw material for the printer which is used to print all the toys Santa delivers. Because the Printer can transform the raw material into whatever molecular structure is required at the Point of Printing (POP) using Just-In-Time Quantum Transmutation (JITQT), most anything would do for raw material. The cookie and milk thing was just a convenient way to make sure something relatively consistent was on hand for processing. Santa used to use coal but it was pretty messy and heavy to haul around. This was also the reason bad children used to get coal in their stockings. It was really the same present they would have gotten had they been good, but Santa used it as a metaphor for the fact that the child had not put the effort into being a better person and so Santa had not put the effort into transforming the coal to a better present.
                        Interestingly, the processing of the raw materials into presents uses energy created by a room temperature fusion pre-processor on the AD3k and, since the pre-processing generates far more energy than is required by the JITQT, the additional energy is piped back to power the sleigh. This used to generate a great deal of heat and so Santa had to run the feed line down the chimney for insulation against any heat damage. In recent years though, Santa's R&D team came up with a special super cooled cable made of Nb-Ti fibers in an aluminium and copper matrix that is flexible enough so it can be dropped through a window, door or ventilation duct.






                        share|improve this answer








                        New contributor




                        Russ Harrison is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                          5














                          Technically Santa does not actually eat the cookies, although he does feed them to his Alchemist Delight 3000 Matter Warping 3D printer (AD3k). The cookies are raw material for the printer which is used to print all the toys Santa delivers. Because the Printer can transform the raw material into whatever molecular structure is required at the Point of Printing (POP) using Just-In-Time Quantum Transmutation (JITQT), most anything would do for raw material. The cookie and milk thing was just a convenient way to make sure something relatively consistent was on hand for processing. Santa used to use coal but it was pretty messy and heavy to haul around. This was also the reason bad children used to get coal in their stockings. It was really the same present they would have gotten had they been good, but Santa used it as a metaphor for the fact that the child had not put the effort into being a better person and so Santa had not put the effort into transforming the coal to a better present.
                          Interestingly, the processing of the raw materials into presents uses energy created by a room temperature fusion pre-processor on the AD3k and, since the pre-processing generates far more energy than is required by the JITQT, the additional energy is piped back to power the sleigh. This used to generate a great deal of heat and so Santa had to run the feed line down the chimney for insulation against any heat damage. In recent years though, Santa's R&D team came up with a special super cooled cable made of Nb-Ti fibers in an aluminium and copper matrix that is flexible enough so it can be dropped through a window, door or ventilation duct.






                          share|improve this answer








                          New contributor




                          Russ Harrison is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                          Check out our Code of Conduct.





















                            5












                            5








                            5






                            Technically Santa does not actually eat the cookies, although he does feed them to his Alchemist Delight 3000 Matter Warping 3D printer (AD3k). The cookies are raw material for the printer which is used to print all the toys Santa delivers. Because the Printer can transform the raw material into whatever molecular structure is required at the Point of Printing (POP) using Just-In-Time Quantum Transmutation (JITQT), most anything would do for raw material. The cookie and milk thing was just a convenient way to make sure something relatively consistent was on hand for processing. Santa used to use coal but it was pretty messy and heavy to haul around. This was also the reason bad children used to get coal in their stockings. It was really the same present they would have gotten had they been good, but Santa used it as a metaphor for the fact that the child had not put the effort into being a better person and so Santa had not put the effort into transforming the coal to a better present.
                            Interestingly, the processing of the raw materials into presents uses energy created by a room temperature fusion pre-processor on the AD3k and, since the pre-processing generates far more energy than is required by the JITQT, the additional energy is piped back to power the sleigh. This used to generate a great deal of heat and so Santa had to run the feed line down the chimney for insulation against any heat damage. In recent years though, Santa's R&D team came up with a special super cooled cable made of Nb-Ti fibers in an aluminium and copper matrix that is flexible enough so it can be dropped through a window, door or ventilation duct.






                            share|improve this answer








                            New contributor




                            Russ Harrison is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                            Check out our Code of Conduct.









                            Technically Santa does not actually eat the cookies, although he does feed them to his Alchemist Delight 3000 Matter Warping 3D printer (AD3k). The cookies are raw material for the printer which is used to print all the toys Santa delivers. Because the Printer can transform the raw material into whatever molecular structure is required at the Point of Printing (POP) using Just-In-Time Quantum Transmutation (JITQT), most anything would do for raw material. The cookie and milk thing was just a convenient way to make sure something relatively consistent was on hand for processing. Santa used to use coal but it was pretty messy and heavy to haul around. This was also the reason bad children used to get coal in their stockings. It was really the same present they would have gotten had they been good, but Santa used it as a metaphor for the fact that the child had not put the effort into being a better person and so Santa had not put the effort into transforming the coal to a better present.
                            Interestingly, the processing of the raw materials into presents uses energy created by a room temperature fusion pre-processor on the AD3k and, since the pre-processing generates far more energy than is required by the JITQT, the additional energy is piped back to power the sleigh. This used to generate a great deal of heat and so Santa had to run the feed line down the chimney for insulation against any heat damage. In recent years though, Santa's R&D team came up with a special super cooled cable made of Nb-Ti fibers in an aluminium and copper matrix that is flexible enough so it can be dropped through a window, door or ventilation duct.







                            share|improve this answer








                            New contributor




                            Russ Harrison is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                            share|improve this answer



                            share|improve this answer






                            New contributor




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                            answered Dec 28 '18 at 4:13









                            Russ Harrison

                            511




                            511




                            New contributor




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                            New contributor





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                                4














                                A fun fact about Santa is that he is like a bear, except he hibernates the rest of the year except winter. So he has to eat a whole lot of sugar, fruit, or anything that the good boys and girls live to him so he can stay the rest of the year cozy in his north pole house.






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                                  4














                                  A fun fact about Santa is that he is like a bear, except he hibernates the rest of the year except winter. So he has to eat a whole lot of sugar, fruit, or anything that the good boys and girls live to him so he can stay the rest of the year cozy in his north pole house.






                                  share|improve this answer










                                  New contributor




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                                    4












                                    4








                                    4






                                    A fun fact about Santa is that he is like a bear, except he hibernates the rest of the year except winter. So he has to eat a whole lot of sugar, fruit, or anything that the good boys and girls live to him so he can stay the rest of the year cozy in his north pole house.






                                    share|improve this answer










                                    New contributor




                                    Borja Landaburu is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                                    A fun fact about Santa is that he is like a bear, except he hibernates the rest of the year except winter. So he has to eat a whole lot of sugar, fruit, or anything that the good boys and girls live to him so he can stay the rest of the year cozy in his north pole house.







                                    share|improve this answer










                                    New contributor




                                    Borja Landaburu is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                                    share|improve this answer



                                    share|improve this answer








                                    edited Dec 27 '18 at 9:09









                                    L.Dutch

                                    76.7k25183374




                                    76.7k25183374






                                    New contributor




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                                    answered Dec 27 '18 at 9:00









                                    Borja Landaburu

                                    1014




                                    1014




                                    New contributor




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                                    New contributor





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                                        2














                                        Santa is at minimum a being with access to some technology that lets him, travel faster than the speed of light without destroying everything he interacts with, keep track of every living human simultaneously with enough detail to judge weather they've been good or bad, fit through any space he wants, carry a toy for every child on the planet in a sack - while going faster than light speed mind you -, and the means of producing a toy for every child on the planet based on how good they've been and what they've requested.



                                        Santa is very easily a being on par with or greater than Zeus, the Greek god of thunder. Santa can do whatever he wants. For all we know, Santa dilates time to fit his needs and has replacedadded several of his organs to synthesize all the nutrients he needs from milk and cookies. Santa could be taking several years from his side of things to deliver all of these toys. The milk and cookies could be the only food he has to survive. He could be eating a perfectly healthy diet, living at a perfectly healthy weight, for whatever species a Santa is.



                                        tl:dr; Santa might as well be Thanos or Darkseid. Santa could easily be stronger and more cunning than both too. Santa eats what Santa wants.






                                        share|improve this answer


























                                          2














                                          Santa is at minimum a being with access to some technology that lets him, travel faster than the speed of light without destroying everything he interacts with, keep track of every living human simultaneously with enough detail to judge weather they've been good or bad, fit through any space he wants, carry a toy for every child on the planet in a sack - while going faster than light speed mind you -, and the means of producing a toy for every child on the planet based on how good they've been and what they've requested.



                                          Santa is very easily a being on par with or greater than Zeus, the Greek god of thunder. Santa can do whatever he wants. For all we know, Santa dilates time to fit his needs and has replacedadded several of his organs to synthesize all the nutrients he needs from milk and cookies. Santa could be taking several years from his side of things to deliver all of these toys. The milk and cookies could be the only food he has to survive. He could be eating a perfectly healthy diet, living at a perfectly healthy weight, for whatever species a Santa is.



                                          tl:dr; Santa might as well be Thanos or Darkseid. Santa could easily be stronger and more cunning than both too. Santa eats what Santa wants.






                                          share|improve this answer
























                                            2












                                            2








                                            2






                                            Santa is at minimum a being with access to some technology that lets him, travel faster than the speed of light without destroying everything he interacts with, keep track of every living human simultaneously with enough detail to judge weather they've been good or bad, fit through any space he wants, carry a toy for every child on the planet in a sack - while going faster than light speed mind you -, and the means of producing a toy for every child on the planet based on how good they've been and what they've requested.



                                            Santa is very easily a being on par with or greater than Zeus, the Greek god of thunder. Santa can do whatever he wants. For all we know, Santa dilates time to fit his needs and has replacedadded several of his organs to synthesize all the nutrients he needs from milk and cookies. Santa could be taking several years from his side of things to deliver all of these toys. The milk and cookies could be the only food he has to survive. He could be eating a perfectly healthy diet, living at a perfectly healthy weight, for whatever species a Santa is.



                                            tl:dr; Santa might as well be Thanos or Darkseid. Santa could easily be stronger and more cunning than both too. Santa eats what Santa wants.






                                            share|improve this answer












                                            Santa is at minimum a being with access to some technology that lets him, travel faster than the speed of light without destroying everything he interacts with, keep track of every living human simultaneously with enough detail to judge weather they've been good or bad, fit through any space he wants, carry a toy for every child on the planet in a sack - while going faster than light speed mind you -, and the means of producing a toy for every child on the planet based on how good they've been and what they've requested.



                                            Santa is very easily a being on par with or greater than Zeus, the Greek god of thunder. Santa can do whatever he wants. For all we know, Santa dilates time to fit his needs and has replacedadded several of his organs to synthesize all the nutrients he needs from milk and cookies. Santa could be taking several years from his side of things to deliver all of these toys. The milk and cookies could be the only food he has to survive. He could be eating a perfectly healthy diet, living at a perfectly healthy weight, for whatever species a Santa is.



                                            tl:dr; Santa might as well be Thanos or Darkseid. Santa could easily be stronger and more cunning than both too. Santa eats what Santa wants.







                                            share|improve this answer












                                            share|improve this answer



                                            share|improve this answer










                                            answered Dec 27 '18 at 15:44









                                            Steve

                                            99628




                                            99628























                                                1














                                                The cookies Santa eats don't go into his normal stomach, but into a matter converter that provides most of the energy to lift his sleigh full of toys and power the Tardis-like sack that pulls the right toy for the right child across the fourth dimension.



                                                The preference for chimneys as home entry paths was to disguise the plumes of steam and smoke early versions of the process produced.






                                                share|improve this answer


























                                                  1














                                                  The cookies Santa eats don't go into his normal stomach, but into a matter converter that provides most of the energy to lift his sleigh full of toys and power the Tardis-like sack that pulls the right toy for the right child across the fourth dimension.



                                                  The preference for chimneys as home entry paths was to disguise the plumes of steam and smoke early versions of the process produced.






                                                  share|improve this answer
























                                                    1












                                                    1








                                                    1






                                                    The cookies Santa eats don't go into his normal stomach, but into a matter converter that provides most of the energy to lift his sleigh full of toys and power the Tardis-like sack that pulls the right toy for the right child across the fourth dimension.



                                                    The preference for chimneys as home entry paths was to disguise the plumes of steam and smoke early versions of the process produced.






                                                    share|improve this answer












                                                    The cookies Santa eats don't go into his normal stomach, but into a matter converter that provides most of the energy to lift his sleigh full of toys and power the Tardis-like sack that pulls the right toy for the right child across the fourth dimension.



                                                    The preference for chimneys as home entry paths was to disguise the plumes of steam and smoke early versions of the process produced.







                                                    share|improve this answer












                                                    share|improve this answer



                                                    share|improve this answer










                                                    answered Dec 28 '18 at 16:18









                                                    arp

                                                    87128




                                                    87128























                                                        0














                                                        As I've pointed out elsewhere, Santa is not sequential, he's (massively) parallel. So just as you need to connect every machine in your Beowulf cluster to a power source, every instance of Santa needs a certain number of cookies, and there are a sufficient number of instances to consume all the cookies without ill effects.



                                                        *Note also that Santa is rather like a bear, in that those cookies he gets on Christmas Eve have to last him through the whole year.






                                                        share|improve this answer


























                                                          0














                                                          As I've pointed out elsewhere, Santa is not sequential, he's (massively) parallel. So just as you need to connect every machine in your Beowulf cluster to a power source, every instance of Santa needs a certain number of cookies, and there are a sufficient number of instances to consume all the cookies without ill effects.



                                                          *Note also that Santa is rather like a bear, in that those cookies he gets on Christmas Eve have to last him through the whole year.






                                                          share|improve this answer
























                                                            0












                                                            0








                                                            0






                                                            As I've pointed out elsewhere, Santa is not sequential, he's (massively) parallel. So just as you need to connect every machine in your Beowulf cluster to a power source, every instance of Santa needs a certain number of cookies, and there are a sufficient number of instances to consume all the cookies without ill effects.



                                                            *Note also that Santa is rather like a bear, in that those cookies he gets on Christmas Eve have to last him through the whole year.






                                                            share|improve this answer












                                                            As I've pointed out elsewhere, Santa is not sequential, he's (massively) parallel. So just as you need to connect every machine in your Beowulf cluster to a power source, every instance of Santa needs a certain number of cookies, and there are a sufficient number of instances to consume all the cookies without ill effects.



                                                            *Note also that Santa is rather like a bear, in that those cookies he gets on Christmas Eve have to last him through the whole year.







                                                            share|improve this answer












                                                            share|improve this answer



                                                            share|improve this answer










                                                            answered Dec 27 '18 at 20:50









                                                            jamesqf

                                                            9,98311937




                                                            9,98311937























                                                                0














                                                                Santa doesn't need to eat all the cookies. The non-believers just assume that the parents eat all the cookies while the children are in bed. Or the dog. And believers know it must be Santa and his reindeer.



                                                                And who's to say they aren't both right? Santa is the master of stagemanship. He uses the fact that perception and reality often blur to make his mystique what it is today. Who knows how many of the cookies Santa eats. 50%? 10%? .00001%? How can you determine the amount if all the cookies are gone and no one can give you an un-biased answer?



                                                                Santa knows how to make a name into a brand, and cookies are only the tip of the iceberg.






                                                                share|improve this answer


























                                                                  0














                                                                  Santa doesn't need to eat all the cookies. The non-believers just assume that the parents eat all the cookies while the children are in bed. Or the dog. And believers know it must be Santa and his reindeer.



                                                                  And who's to say they aren't both right? Santa is the master of stagemanship. He uses the fact that perception and reality often blur to make his mystique what it is today. Who knows how many of the cookies Santa eats. 50%? 10%? .00001%? How can you determine the amount if all the cookies are gone and no one can give you an un-biased answer?



                                                                  Santa knows how to make a name into a brand, and cookies are only the tip of the iceberg.






                                                                  share|improve this answer
























                                                                    0












                                                                    0








                                                                    0






                                                                    Santa doesn't need to eat all the cookies. The non-believers just assume that the parents eat all the cookies while the children are in bed. Or the dog. And believers know it must be Santa and his reindeer.



                                                                    And who's to say they aren't both right? Santa is the master of stagemanship. He uses the fact that perception and reality often blur to make his mystique what it is today. Who knows how many of the cookies Santa eats. 50%? 10%? .00001%? How can you determine the amount if all the cookies are gone and no one can give you an un-biased answer?



                                                                    Santa knows how to make a name into a brand, and cookies are only the tip of the iceberg.






                                                                    share|improve this answer












                                                                    Santa doesn't need to eat all the cookies. The non-believers just assume that the parents eat all the cookies while the children are in bed. Or the dog. And believers know it must be Santa and his reindeer.



                                                                    And who's to say they aren't both right? Santa is the master of stagemanship. He uses the fact that perception and reality often blur to make his mystique what it is today. Who knows how many of the cookies Santa eats. 50%? 10%? .00001%? How can you determine the amount if all the cookies are gone and no one can give you an un-biased answer?



                                                                    Santa knows how to make a name into a brand, and cookies are only the tip of the iceberg.







                                                                    share|improve this answer












                                                                    share|improve this answer



                                                                    share|improve this answer










                                                                    answered yesterday









                                                                    bruglesco

                                                                    4481214




                                                                    4481214

















                                                                        protected by Community Dec 28 '18 at 11:47



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